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Matchmaker Amber Kelleher-Andrews: How to Save Time and Effort with Dating

Finding a match—let alone a good one—can come at a tremendous cost emotionally, monetarily and physically

by Amber Kelleher-Andrews

February 10, 2023

Amber Kelleher-Andrews / Illustration: Joel Kimmel

Many daters out there are wasting their time searching for that needle in a haystack. The amount of effort and energy you put into finding a match—let alone a good one—comes at a tremendous cost, emotionally, monetarily and physically. It can be exhausting to go on date after date without making significant progress to get closer to what you want. And with online dating, each time you’re starting all over again. Sure, you can tell the algorithm that you want blue eyes or brown eyes, but you can’t really understand someone’s personality. In matchmaking, it’s all about who the person is: what motivates them, what their passion is, and where they see themselves in the near future. All of those things can’t be captured in photos on dating apps.

The biggest dating obstacle I see is that people don’t know how to correctly choose for themselves, and they forget to look back at their patterns. If someone’s going through a divorce, they don’t want to think about it and just want to find someone new. In matchmaking we have immediate, up-front conversations so clients can move forward with a better sense of direction. They become accountable for their actions and don’t repeat dysfunctional behaviors. If you don’t notice these patterns, you’re going to keep meeting people who aren’t the right fit for you. When people are very busy and trying to date on their own, they don’t think about these factors.

Matchmaking is a journey, and the needle is always moving forward. Thought goes into the before, during and after stages of a date. It’s a smart and effective way to save you time and money because it’s curated specifically to who you are and what you want in life. We work for busy executives because we understand that time is money.

A positive from the global pandemic is that it allowed people to work virtually. Now I can hire the best in the country from any zip code. The states I see with the highest dating traffic are in the New York tristate area, California, Texas and Florida. And in Europe—London is big. During the pandemic I knew we needed to change the company if we were going to survive as an in-person matchmaking firm. We started doing virtual dating, and everyone I spoke with felt isolated and said they couldn’t wait to attend events and be social again. It was during this time that I realized we are really a social club for exciting globe-trotters who are kicking ass in business and want the best partner in their life. This inspired the launch of our new social club, coming this year, consisting of a community of entrepreneurs who are passionate about life and apply that same passion to finding a match. Through meaningful gatherings our clients can come together for a shared cause, whether it’s how to prevent sex trafficking or efforts to save the oceans. We’re also partnering with Elton John’s AIDS Foundation and Steven Tyler’s Janie’s Fund. Our clubhouses give people a location to congregate and discuss significant topics that are important to them.

My mom started Kelleher International more than 36 years ago and I saw how much joy the job brought her. There are so many great people in the world, and no two matches are alike. I love owning my own business, I love working with my mom, and I love having a vision and seeing it come to fruition. And with our new social club experience, we’ll help bring people together for a shared purpose.

Amber Kelleher-Andrews, CEO of Kelleher International, is a world-renowned relationship expert, professional matchmaker and philanthropy enthusiast. Under her 28-year stewardship, Kelleher-Andrews has grown her mother’s boutique San Francisco firm into an international multimillion-dollar premium brand that caters to the most successful singles in the world.